At the close of a previously unannounced meeting between Illinois Governor Bruce Rauner and legislative leaders, Rauner announced that public funds will be used to fund public colleges and universities.
"While we have not been able to implement every element of my Turnaround Agenda, the state certainly has taken a turn, even if some people are sayin' it's for the worse," Rauner said. "Hell, could be a year of no fundin' is enough reformin' for right now, even for those public universities, which have sure been livin' high on the hog."
Rauner, a Dartmouth and Harvard graduate whose greatest passion is education, had previously vetoed all bills using state funds to fund state universities, arguing that the best way to promote business in Illinois was to cut off state funding for state universities.
As of press time, no specific amount of public funding for public universities had been announced.
Dave's April Fools joke!
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